Thursday, October 21, 2010
Thursday, October 14, 2010
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Lonely?
Loneliness adds a certain beauty to life.
It puts a special burn on sunsets and makes night air smell better.
Oh my God.
Wooooo! Spring is here and the weather is finally starting to show it! Isn't it exciting. HOWEVER it also seems to be door knocking "hey, may we convert you to our religion???!!!" season.
So there I am, watching Bruno when all of a sudden "knock knock". Curious, I go to the door and open it a crack, and standing there are two respectable young men carrying bibles. I quickly add i'm sorry, i'm already a Christian.
If you have an imagination or are completely gullible, continue reading
---------------------If not, skip this paragraph----------------------
They then scream "EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!" I dash backwards as I see the bible they were actually holding was a Qur'an (Muslim bible for you religiously incompetent) I glimpse up to see the beards rapidly grow and their nice moisturized hands turn into hideous claws with talons the size of butcher knives. I sprinted back to my Muslim defense closet and grabbed two vials of holy water, "BAM!" the sound of my mothers head exploding filled the house as one of the creatures used it's tongue to force pressure from her neck to the top of her head, blood and brain matter dripped mercilessly off the roof and walls, lathering the two creatures in my bloodline. I know if I do not kill them now they'll hunt me down forever.
I cast a vial of holy water at one of them, the vial smashes on it's head and it's flesh starts to burn and decay. "POP"... that was the sound it made as it exploded everywhere, showering me in it's guts. Confident, I toss my last vial of holy water at the creature, however this one seems to have caught on, it catches my water and tosses it out the window. I stumble backwards as it's claws tear through the walls towards me and it's acidic tongue slashing my face, I race into my room and climb aboard my pink unicorn and ride towards the rainbows in search of cover, the beast leaped after me, but with the combined power of myself and the unicorn we both shot super powered fairies and the beast was no more. I returned home and cleaned up the bloody gory mess.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
then I closed the door.
So there I am, watching Bruno when all of a sudden "knock knock". Curious, I go to the door and open it a crack, and standing there are two respectable young men carrying bibles. I quickly add i'm sorry, i'm already a Christian.
If you have an imagination or are completely gullible, continue reading
---------------------If not, skip this paragraph----------------------
They then scream "EXTERMINATE! EXTERMINATE!" I dash backwards as I see the bible they were actually holding was a Qur'an (Muslim bible for you religiously incompetent) I glimpse up to see the beards rapidly grow and their nice moisturized hands turn into hideous claws with talons the size of butcher knives. I sprinted back to my Muslim defense closet and grabbed two vials of holy water, "BAM!" the sound of my mothers head exploding filled the house as one of the creatures used it's tongue to force pressure from her neck to the top of her head, blood and brain matter dripped mercilessly off the roof and walls, lathering the two creatures in my bloodline. I know if I do not kill them now they'll hunt me down forever.
I cast a vial of holy water at one of them, the vial smashes on it's head and it's flesh starts to burn and decay. "POP"... that was the sound it made as it exploded everywhere, showering me in it's guts. Confident, I toss my last vial of holy water at the creature, however this one seems to have caught on, it catches my water and tosses it out the window. I stumble backwards as it's claws tear through the walls towards me and it's acidic tongue slashing my face, I race into my room and climb aboard my pink unicorn and ride towards the rainbows in search of cover, the beast leaped after me, but with the combined power of myself and the unicorn we both shot super powered fairies and the beast was no more. I returned home and cleaned up the bloody gory mess.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------
then I closed the door.
Monday, October 11, 2010
Domi-NO-'s
So, something extraordinary happened today. After getting off the mobile mental institution they call a bus, I trudge home wondering what flavour chips to have in my routine chippy sandwich.
After soundly deciding on Salt & Vinegar I look to my left only to see a magnificent sight. A young boy, probably aged around 9-10, was backing out of his front door laying down dominos faster than I've ever seen before, in seconds he was already down his front few steps. Then, I hear a sharp bang from inside the house (possibly a door closing?). I watch in awe and sorrow as from inside the house I see the dominoes falling down, leading a path of destruction right to the boy. The boy then dropped to his knees, looked up at me with a face stricken with grief, then to my surprise the boy screamed a scream almost identical to my vacuum cleaner "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!".
I quickened my pace and sped home, sat down, had my sandwich and jumped on here to share this frightful chapter of my day with you.
Also, has anyone noticed the bus charge go up? I mean GST rose from 12.5% to 15%, the bus fares should in theory only be $1.025 for a student, this rise to $1.50 is absolutely ridiculous, I have a mind to mail a calculator to Runcimans and give them the equation to work out how much the fare should have really increased. Slack work Runcimans, slack.
After soundly deciding on Salt & Vinegar I look to my left only to see a magnificent sight. A young boy, probably aged around 9-10, was backing out of his front door laying down dominos faster than I've ever seen before, in seconds he was already down his front few steps. Then, I hear a sharp bang from inside the house (possibly a door closing?). I watch in awe and sorrow as from inside the house I see the dominoes falling down, leading a path of destruction right to the boy. The boy then dropped to his knees, looked up at me with a face stricken with grief, then to my surprise the boy screamed a scream almost identical to my vacuum cleaner "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!".
I quickened my pace and sped home, sat down, had my sandwich and jumped on here to share this frightful chapter of my day with you.
Also, has anyone noticed the bus charge go up? I mean GST rose from 12.5% to 15%, the bus fares should in theory only be $1.025 for a student, this rise to $1.50 is absolutely ridiculous, I have a mind to mail a calculator to Runcimans and give them the equation to work out how much the fare should have really increased. Slack work Runcimans, slack.
Sunday, October 10, 2010
First day of blogging
So, this is my first blog. Never quite thought i'd be here but what do ya know. (I like to complain alot so this blog is probably going to be riddled with little spiels about things I find annoying.)
Basically i'm an in-extraordinary person living an in-extraordinary life. I named this blog "What a day" because despite not having what one might call an exciting life, I can I have my moments, usually at least one a day. I enjoy the little things in life and will probably post these "little things" throughout this blog.
Basically i'm an in-extraordinary person living an in-extraordinary life. I named this blog "What a day" because despite not having what one might call an exciting life, I can I have my moments, usually at least one a day. I enjoy the little things in life and will probably post these "little things" throughout this blog.
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